J, I want you to know that I had to go out tonight, but, I couldnt get you out of my head.

I am so sorry if I upset you. That is never my intent.

You do have a way of taking just little snippets of posts, ignoring the rest and latching on to that one thing.

So, you took one sentence out of my post, and that is all you saw.

It's ok. It's just not a good thing for you.

I want to tell you something. When all this happened with my h, I thought I wasnt going to make it through it. Mach showed you one of my first posts.

I understand completely what your fears are. I had similiar ones.

And I just want you to understand where they are coming from.
Because when you do, you can face them.

You wrote this:

Is is that I think I failed? Is it rejection? Is it control/possession? Is it insecurity?

Really think about it. It could be all of them.

What is is about failure, rejection, insecurity, control that makes this fear so powerful?

I know for me, failure, rejection and insecurity was firmly rooted in my lack of self worth.

Once I was able to see who I was and that I was ok, the fears lessened.

When the fears of insecurity and failure lessen, the ability to see yourself in a more positive light grows.

Which is where I want you to start going.

I see so many things in you, J. I see a sense of humor and a gentleness. I see the ability for you to be brutally honest about your feelings.

I see someone who is trying to find his way.

I am not letting you off the hook because I believe in you.

What is it about fear of failure and loss of control and insecurity that makes it so powerful?

Gotta dig deep, my friend to face your fears. Only then can you really grow.