J, you wouldnt be happy at first. That doesnt mean you wouldnt find happiness.

I was trying to get you to see, and I see I failed, that if you face your biggest fear, you would be ok.

But I see you arent ready for that and thats ok.

Listen, please dont let this derail you. Continue searching for the reasons why you feel the way you do.

Right now, continue to work on you. Find your worth. Try to meet your goals. Work your mission statement.