The hardest thing for you might be to keep your expectations at a minimum. It will be the best thing you can do.
This is exactly what I have to do! Thanks KD. Only my expectations can hurt me. I do not want to re-open the wound. MWD wrote that any outcome always takes longer than you (the BS) thinks it should. I will keep planning my GAL and I am going ot make of list of 180's that I think I should focus on while she is here.
I have not had a lot of time to practice 180's in person with her so it will be time to really make the changes I have been recognizing I want to make as a person and a spouse with her.
This situation is absolutely one where if I am not conscious about my problems with control, that I would most definitely try to orchestrate our interactions and her reactions for fear that she might hurt me.
She can't hurt me. My expectations, if unrealistic, can hurt me.
So I've got some things to keep thinking about before she arrives. GAL expecially. I'm glad I have a vacation planned 2 weeks after she arrives.
I know I shouldn't plan all activities with her but I don't want to ignore her and just keep running out of the house. Should I on occasion invite her along? Like I'm going for a walk or headed to the garden center would she like to ride along?
Me(F):40 WAW:44 T:13yrs M:9yrs BD:2/12 (I saw a text) ILYBINILWY: 5/12 PA admission: 12/12 (began 3/11) S:2/13 Moves in w/AP D begins: 7/13 W moves home to R: 10/13
