Dave36, You have come a long way in the last month. I'm impressed with your attitude now. lacknlvn, Listen to Dave36. We are all trying to do what he suggests. The improvement has to come from you first. Hopefully she then will follow your lead. My situation is identical to yours: * Disappointing honeymoon * Sex 3x per year * Rejected 9 times out of 10 * W won't read the books * etc. etc. but... after a couple of weeks of changing myself (suppressing my anger mostly) and focussing on love languages I have got her to agree to ML once every week and so far she has complied. It is possible to go from nothing to something... My advice. When a situation arises (for example an argument) think to yourself "What I have been doing has not worked so I must do the exact opposite". Instead of going in all guns blazing to win the argument, diffuse it by agreeing with her. After a couple of weeks of your completely different behaviour tell her gently that you would really like to improve your sex lives (it will not be a surprise to her of course) and suggest that, for a trial period, she agree to ML with you once a week on a fixed day and time and that she should accept it as an experiment and not turn you down, "Just do it". If she’s reluctant, ask her “What harm can it possibly do?” The hope with this routine is that after a few weeks her hang-ups will disappear and it will become an accepted part of life. Who knows you may eventually get some mid week too! SD
