I do have a copy of divorce remedy, I've read it cover to cover! I have definitely decided that my H is crisis (what sort of crisis). I'm not sure of. The thing is I'm honestly not snooping, but by pure accident. I keep running into things. I logged on to FB for something else, and the OW popped up as a suggested friend. I guess the lesson is stay away from FB. Our circle of friend's is really tight. We were that couple, my friend's were his friend's and vice versa. Waiting at the bus stop to go home, and he pops out a pizza place. I watched him walk down the street. Honestly, I don't obsess over where he is, or what he's doing, or what stage he's in (convinced he's still in replay).I just say a little prayer for him, and try to keep taking it a day at a time. I usually feel better, when I don't know what's happening. When I do find out or see something, it's like a slap to the face. I have almost gotten used to this alternate reality(which is scary). I do believe that if we have a shot at reconciliation, I probably don't need to know everything. So i am learning to accept things, as they are. Which he even said himself, that he has done so much, there is no way that I would forgive him.
Over the past 6 months, I have really worked to put myself in a good mental space, and practice GAL. Just a fake it 'till you make it type of thing. Hopefully, one day it won't be an action to DB, but just happen without a thought.
However, when I put a timeline together. My H really started really acting out in May, so this is really coming up on year for me. Who really knows, when it started for him. I'm growing really weary, how do you get the strength to go on? And why is he so angry with me? You would think, that I was the one that had done all of this
Hope this explains a little better
M 32 H 35 M 3/ SS 8yrs BD 7/5/12 S 10/1/12 H wants Divorce 1/13 It's official served 5/13
