I'm right here with you, girlfriend. Every step of the way. Consider me your parallel partner in crime.
Here's how I view this (and I hope you realize I'm supporting your decision):
An ultimatum is only manipulation if you want the other person to give you something that they don't want to give you. However, if you are telling them something that might be misconstrued as manipulation but you really want, it is not.
I'm at exactly this point in my own life, Opt. I'm not willing to sit out here in limbo much longer. He's either in or he's out... there will be no middle ground for me.
So, the question is: Are you really and truly at peace with your decision?
If not 100% sure, I would recommend holding out a little while longer until you know for sure what has to be done to put yourself in a better spot. Me? I'm heading back to MC on Thursday. I'm planning on asking him to call Mr. W. and ask him to go alone to the next one, and setting another one for the both of us.
If Mr. Wonderful really wants to be dealt out of this hand, I will gladly initiate the D filing. My D10 has told me a few times over the past month, "Mom, would you PLEASE just get rid of him so we know what we're doing? I'm so sick of hoping he'll come home. If he's not, I just want to think about something else."
Amen, sister.
Big hugs....
Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
