Oh 2chiqs, I have a feeling you and I have a lot in common. I always had control issues with my kids...right up until BD 7 months ago....that's 16 years worth. Don't go down that path
I let go of control. I wanted S to be smart and well dressed and on schedule and etc and etc and etc all his little life. Thank God he is his own person, I could have seriously done some damage to the kid. But S16 turned out just as fine as the other kid who didn't impose all the control. If I could do it again, I would laugh and live a little more.
I never let H have any say and made him feel like moron Dad. Seriously, who wants to feel like that? I realize now that his opinions were just as valid as mine and should have negotiated rather than railroaded.
I use humour a lot as well. So easy to deflect and hide behind, isn't it? Especially when the humour is self deprecating, then you get to think negatively and make everyone laugh....double the fun....
But, when you devalue yourself, everyone else thinks it's okay to do so as well. H did this to himself constantly and then wondered why he felt so depressed all the time...
Pride...ah. I am prideful about my intellect, my kids, my home, and once, my marriage. Took my marriage being flushed to relieve me of all the others lol and just be thankful instead.
Positive energy for your S. He is in my thoughts (((( ))))
