I feel she changed,me in to someone who settles for less in life by constantly saying I put too much into work.
I thought you said her problem with you is that you didn't put enough into work? IE, you can't properly provide, she doesn't have the lifestyle she wants, etc.
Quote:
I need to build something that I can enjoy later right?
I've got a few years on you, and I've seen my share of workaholics. They do not ever slow down later to enjoy things, they just work-work-work at the expense of everything else. Covey asks in 7 Habits what you want people to say about you at your funeral. Do you want them to say "he never left his desk, he was the most dedicated worker I've ever seen, work was everything to him, it was his life" or do you want them to say "he was the most devoted father and husband I've ever seen, he didn't think twice about setting work aside to spend time with his family."
Quote:
DB is about saving yourself right? Well that is exactly what I am doing.
DB is about action. I've seen you talk a lot in your threads about things you want to do. I haven't seen you talk at all about accomplishing any of those things.
Quote:
I think the line between high self esteem, high self worth, and arrogance is very fine. I may talk arrogant but its onl bevause I believe in myself and my capabilities.
Arrogance is not listening when others give you sound advice because you think you know better. It's getting so caught up in how great and smart you think you are that you think it's enough to just talk about all the things you're going to do and never actually do anything. Arrogance is sitting around doing nothing because you think you're so darned great that your W is going to beg to come home when she "comes to her senses". Arrogance is a negative characteristic, it has absolutely nothing to do with confidence, self-esteem or self-worth.
Quote:
Well, this is myself. Some just have an insatiable desire to succeed, while some dont..
True story- I met a 22-year-old crack addict who had birthed 4 children, 3 of which had been removed from her care. She was on welfare and prostituted herself for extra cash to buy more drugs. Her teeth were a rotten mess. She was going to go to nursing school and get her degree, then intern at a local hospital while saving up for a house. She was going to be hugely successful, you should have heard her talk about all the great things she was going to do. And it was all going to start tomorrow. She had an insatiable desire to succeed. Yet she was still a crack addict single mother on welfare. Ambition is a DESIRE for personal achievement. But that's all it is- desire. Actions are another thing entirely. Quit telling us about the things you're going to do some day. Start doing things, and then come here to tell us about them. How about an update on your backyard reno project, how's that coming along?
Quote:
Also, how can you have an ecaggerated sense of your own abilitues?
Absolutely, I see it all the time in my industry (architecture). Kids come out of college thinking they can design buildings when in actuality they don't have a clue about the first step. Here's a Persian proverb for you:
He who knows not, and knows not that he knows not, is a fool, shun him. He who knows not, and knows that he knows not, is a child, teach him. He who knows, and knows not that he knows, is asleep, wake him. He who knows, and knows that he knows, is wise, follow him.
Arrogance = fool
Quote:
I was raised to believe I can achieve anything if I set my mind to it.
A woman here in the office is 6'-4" and 300 pounds. Her daughter used that line on her and she said "Oh, so if I want to be a ballerina I just need to set my mind to it?" Point being, we weren't all meant to be ballerinas. Work towards what YOU can achieve, capitalize on YOUR particular skills.
