Take the hits and keep moving forward.

[azguy]

I hear you.

Part of what makes being attached to someone so difficult is how vulnerable you are. She can hurt you in so many ways, even if she doesn't intend to. There's no way around it. That hurt you're feeling, I think, is because you still care for her. Otherwise what difference is it to you what her actions are?

I often had the same feelings as you about some bad moment spoiling a holiday or a special event in our R. It's hard not to think it'll always be there. I think what triggers this is our hope that the event will be something special, so it's especially jarring when it's something bad.

I'm curious why you feel so strongly about her being with someone else before your R? Do you understand your reaction?