My WAW - coming to terms with it all!

[WAW_SC]

I have a couple of questions for anyone out there.

I have my W birthday and mother's day coming up.

Mother's day is an easy one, will keep it all about the kids.
Her birthday though will be a bot trickier. I guess some kind of simple gift, not too personal but something that lets her know that i care about her. Something thoughtful? Or should it just be a card?
The reason i ask is that I have noticed that my W has put away all the necklaces that I have bought her over the years. She has packed them away as if they never existed. It hurts to see that....Its like she is so upset and angry with me that she cant bare having any reminders of me around her. Why so extreme?

Also, other gifts I have given her havent gone down too well, other than a backpack i bought for her so she could walk into work in the mornings. She uses that every week.

Lastly, when is the right time to make a sincere and unconditional apology. Its been 5 months now since our seperation, we are starting to get a long a little bit since i started DBing ( 5 weeks ago). LRT has been working well, but its so hard to understand how she is feeling at the moment. She is still so guarded.

Any help would be appreciated.