Even in your 10:21 post you sound really grounded. You are doing well Grizz.

Your W will never be happy until she gets this living on her own thing out of her system. Let her go and let the reality stick do its job.

My youngest sister moved out on her H for a full year. She talked and/or did things with him almost every day, and as far as we know, was never involved in an affair. A few weeks ago she moved back home. The lesson here is that once they get to the point your W is at, they MUST give living on their own a whirl, in order for them to see the grass isn't greener on the other side after all. Also that there is still hope.

Get comfortable in the reality of your new life Grizz, this may take a while.

M: A really long time.
Crisis: 5 years.
She's still worth it.

Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose. -Viktor Frankl