Thanks gal, I get it. I sound better personally, not situation. I don't know, I feel more resolute. Don't know if that's better or not, but I can function this way.
I felt lonely for H this morning. I guess that's good in a way because I was able to recognize I haven't felt lonely in awhile. Feeling pressure and stress about big decisions and I wish I didn't have to do all this alone.
D18 has to make final decision for college by May 1. We've (she & I) made choice 90%, just waiting for one last school's numbers. But it occurred to me that we've talked in general about college w/ H, but not specifics about here's the decision!
I text D18: Have you had any conv with dad about your college? Deadline is quickly approaching and I don't know if his opinion has been heard.
D18: No lol. His opinion is non existent.
Ouch! This is another nothing-I-can-do-about it scenario and I won't get in the middle of their relationship. And if he wants to have an opinion, he'll have to make it known. By May 1. It's just another sad reality check where life choices are being made and he's not around to be part of it. Maybe it's me who puts too much weight on these decisions. That's pretty likely too.
GAL has been a little too busy lately. Feeling worn out and unbalanced in being there for kids. Maybe it's best H isn't around for these decision, because I normally would have let the worry monster take over & been miserable to be around. I'm coping much better on my own. Venting here, of course.
