Stuck..how do I get out???

[tiredndrained]

Thanks so much BRNR...I really don't feel that way but I guess I am doing better. I am really trying not to get sucked into my H craziness. I see my older S really struggling. Between being an adolescent now and the probs at home I feel sorry for him and he is really acting out. That is the main reason I tried to be stronger. He made a comment once to me that seeing me sad all the time was upsetting him a lot. I am working on being stronger for them...and I guess also for me to try and get past all this. I'm sure you are just as strong as me...believe me, I am not the benchmark for strength. I feel weak most days. I feel like a fool for sticking with this when it is clearly going nowhere. I know it would be hard to see this, but I think I would actually be better if he weren't here. When you are home together seeing the H run around all the time right in front of your face is so painful. Believe me, I think you are much better off with the H out of the home. Grass is always greener....