If he reaches out, you can respond being kind. If you do initiate, I read in a book about referring to good memories when contacting WAH. It adjusts the receiver's mental picture and the taps into the good feelings attached to the memories before you even say a thing. I tried this a couple times with good results.
Texted H when I saw an old car like the one we used to have, another time about memories about the kids when they were little, he replied 'good times'. It's not necessarily enough to build a R on, but a good reminder that the past isn't the warped version they're remembering.
Most importantly just work on yourself and feel your feelings and GAL. Show grace to yourself and H. Do you ever get the feeling that WAH's don't even really understand what they're doing? Makes me feel bad for them sometimes.
