this is a really interesting and pertinent (all of a sudden) group of posts. i'm wondering for me too - why all of a sudden am i asking myself wtf and why did i stay- and WHAT DO I WANT for the rest of my life. like evryone- i don't want what i have rite now- it $ucks alot. it hurts - it could destroy you if you let it - what would i like?- what we all want of course.
why did i stay in the first place- - - because at that exact time (and shocked rite down to the roots of my hairs) - i was sooooo sure we loved each other and somehow "it will all work out". I also felt "it was worth fighting for - what we had".
now- maybe i was (am) nuts on that count. maybe it's ruined beyond compare (approaching 2 years & seriously exhausted) . maybe it never was what i thought. maybe maybe maybe.
i know it's exhaustion- and frustration - and reality- and h's that are soooo immersed in their own mlc and trauma that i am beginning to wonder IF THEY EVER EVER EVER come out the other side. i sense everyone of us is feeling this sort of thing - how could several years feel like an eternity in he!l? i'm askin ya.
and me too - i wonder IF I WANT this man , if this is truly who he is or has become.
mwd's right - it's the hardest thing we'll ever do. and no guarantee = and it's hard to maintain one's original perspective as time and life wears on. some days i curse her & the book & some days i am thankful-
being apart gives one perspective (i spend alot of time apart) being togethr gives another- i'm apart more- i think it's detrimental more than helpful. not sure tho
reading with interest - glad i'm not alone in something like this in life- if i couldn't read this stuff and realize i'm not the only one going thru this kind of thing - i'd think i was going insane and no kidding...
