You are absolutely right. However, the living situation is what is making this more difficult for me than it should be. For instance, yesteray we had a pancake breakfast feed for a select group of our regular customers, about 50 people. They were invited to stay for the weekend at no charge. During the first 30 minutes of the breakfast, no less than 5 people came up to me to say how sorry they were about the divorce. Some of these peolpe I barely know. Apparently, Wife was busy the day before wandering around the property sharing our situation. Word travels fast around campfires! I really don't wish to have condolences from people who are barely aquintances of mine...customers actually. I don't like to answer the questions about why she is still here, where she will be going, etc....It is just not something I wish to discusss with people. I know how to handle it with proper ettiquette, but it is just the idea that it is going to perpetuate itself until this is all over. It wno't be over until W goes away!
I also have to see her whenever I would like to spend time at my business. It is not that I don't like looking at W, but to be honest, when I am working and trying to be confident in myself I don't like looking at my STBXW hanging around! She is just too much of an integral part of my daily life. It is like a constant reminder, a slap in the face, that she decided to leave me....but she never leaves. She is just here, living her life and making herself right at home. Well, this isn't her home anymore. She chose not to be part of it, so why doesn't she just go away and live her life! Well, part of that reason is she didn't think through all of the consequences of her decision. She left out the big part; not having the financial ability to move on. That is rough. I really feel bad for her, but I feel worse for myself and that is more important for my own well being. She has put me in the position of creating a new life and a new reality. She needs to do the same!
For about the last 7 days I have tried to basically ignore the existence of W, with the exception of replying to her questions or phone calls briefly. It does make my daily life a little easier, but it isn't really changing the dynamic. It is too much for me anymore. I am tired of the damage it is doing to my daughter. I am tired of W not following through with her decision to move on. I am just TIRED.
