Hi zero,
Thank God (& Michelle) for this board!! ... at least to be able to converse with people you do understand where you are coming from about working on your M ... but I, too, can relate to what you are saying. I had only leaned on my Sis for support during the rough times. Since she went thru a D from a abusive H, I did have to run thru much of what she said with a filter ... and now that we are piecing, I rarely talk about it with Sis, because I think she would she me as being a doormat.

You are keeping the lines of communication open with H and I think its great that you talked to him when wanting to hear a friendly voice. I hope you actually used those words on him? It wouldn't hurt to even thank him for being there as a friendly voice and how that was a comfort to you. Its that kind of conversing that helps build a high level of emotional connection.

It made me smirk to read about the banter you & your H has about your C. It creates a commonality the two of you share that allows you to raise a level of levity that can overshadow the anxious thoughts for both of you about working thru these tough issues with C.

Quote:

There is something that I wish my H would do when we're in therapy. I wish he'd sit closer to me and/or touch my hand (arm, shoulder) while we're there. His body language tends to be very guarded as though he's prepared to do battle with me ... <SNIP> Yup, I definately don't like that woman. I think she is doing a good job at helping us work through tough conversations, but I'm not too certain that she's the one who will see us through.

Could be his guard is up because he is not comfortable with C either? I know when we went to C, she deliberately sat us distantly apart and I know I was guarded against C as I didn't trust her to take sides and turn on me. It wouldn't suprise me if your H tried to guard against this too.

'til later,
KAW