I'm trying real hard to be the Shepard.

[SemperFi00]

Hey Mtnman, sorry to hear about the most recent email.

I am sure that the email has generated many thoughts/questions for you and can certainly understand that (living with something similar in that my W has separate checking account where her paycheck is deposited and still uses our joint accounts for 90%+
of expenses).

In my scenario, I struggled w/asking her about the acct, where the $$$ were spent, etc... but finally decided that the answers wouldn't be satisfactory and would not help move things in a positive direction so I didn't ask.... at least havne't asked yet, somedays it is still hard.

It doesn't seem like your W is looking for a response (and seems the she is doing some mind reading of her own re: your reaction), so what do you think would happen if you took some time w/o responding and let things settle a bit? Would taking the time be "something different" in terms of a reponse from you?

I know it's tough when you are in it, sometimes a little easier to suggest from distance....

Thoughts and prayers are with you..... Stay strong!