Defintiely a lesson on the letter. In my M, we were always transparent until I discovered her PA. Then email passwords were changed and she became more "private", etc... Opening each others mail was never an issue. I should have adjusted my marital boundary on this one though. I know everytime her mom sends mail it's a check so it wasn't a suprise to see the small envelope in the mail stack and I really didn't hesitate in the moment, I was just opening the mail.
Reading your post makes me look back at it and wonder why I didn't have a flag go up and stop me? Obviously our R has changed. She functions that way. I still feel the same. If I am lovingly detaching successfully, I shouldn't feel the same should I? I should have recognized what is now a new boundary in our R and her need for space and privacy.
Originally Posted By: RealityTrip
What do you all think? Is it more effective to remain completely dark or should I think of it as a dimmer switch and when the opportunity arises to have a positive interaction go ahead and take it?
I'm really interested to hear thoughts on this question?!?
Me(F):40 WAW:44 T:13yrs M:9yrs BD:2/12 (I saw a text) ILYBINILWY: 5/12 PA admission: 12/12 (began 3/11) S:2/13 Moves in w/AP D begins: 7/13 W moves home to R: 10/13
