That's the thing - nothing he has said or done convinced me, if anything it could've been the opposite. Some of the negative things are still there - but I am choosing to deal with them instead of ignoring them (or sometimes choosing not to allow them be negative.)
It's a change in my perception/acceptance that the bad things aren't really deal breakers - and should never have been. I can't change my H and I love him - faults and all. I'm not perfect, so how can I expect him to be? Changing the way I look at things means that I don't have to worry about those things anymore...
As for the fears - it's not that you shouldn't discuss them - just don't think you can "fix it".
If you have frequent contact, do try to stay positive. From my experience, the more my H was negative/sad/low - the further I wanted to be from him. I felt the negative energy was draining and I didn't have enough energy for the both of us...
