I am glad you are recognizing things in yourself and I am also happy that you were able to see the two sides of the possible outcome.
I would submit that you answered it best when you said, "I just keep telling myself that I did the right thing"... that you did the right thing... FOR YOU... and the rest of it, "and to be PATEINT and I will see" should be dropped, as that is filled with expectations.
Patient yes, but patiently waiting for a result? That's expectations.
So, do what you do because it is right, for you. Do what you do, while considering consequences. Do what you do, which at the very least "keeps the road home paved and smooth".
Because even if you do not R, these are skills and values that will help you in the future to have great relationships, regardless.
