Maybe I'm not clear on something. What kind of "rules" does he keep changing?
Yes, as your therapist indicates, trying to make him happy is possibly pursuit behaviour. It can also possibly be co-dependent behaviour.
What are your therapists thoughts on how you can change your approach in order to solve these problems?
So, are you saying that there is no parenting plan in place?
Then, why are you chasing him (more pursuit behaviour) to work on the schedule. The onus should be on him to let YOU know when he wants to visit with D4.
Originally Posted By: tnmom66
I do not believe that we cannot control others. I believe we can influence some people in some ways some of the time, if we know what buttons to push. I am only interested in a win-win situation and right now we are in a lose-lose situation.
ouch... that appeared to me, to be a very contradictory paragraph.
In my experience, one of the biggest challenges most people have is accepting that a solution or path to a solution that does not look like we imagined, can still be OK. People seem to feel that win / win is black white and everything that does not look like what we hoped win / win would look like, is suddenly dropped into the loose / loose bucket.
