My painting party wasn't for you, I like blue!

[albamarie]

I see now why D can/should be an option! My not-H drove over a city median dntown last night distroying the drivers side tires, rims, and who knows what else. He's fine but I had to be his call to rescue, insurance, tow, and more communication w/him than I am comfortable w.

That part wasn't too bad, though I'd rather not, but this morning he's spewing his justification as to why this just "brings him out" and flares his evil anger I don't care, I poured a cup of coffee and went to my room where he followed to explain to me that he's going to take this as an evil trying to get him, so bring it on!

He will go through different phases of how his mind is going to handle this, but there is no immediate ability to accept sitches like an adult. Now he's spewing that I let my s21 drive away without a verbal blessing, he's showing his fear and feeling of vulnerability.

I'm not strong enough to take much more, I'm feeling a little exhausted, and deflated. His anger is so intense and just being in the house w/him I can feel the air very thick, though he is now back to his video game. I'm not free to go out yet, I'm waiting for the insurance, plus hell its cold and we are in for a severe thunderstorm so where am I going!

I am thankful for the distance I have created I'm not getting sucked in here. Even last night after I did all the ness. Insurance stuff he saw that I was not treating him as my L, but as a buss. partner. He politely said thank you!

It is taking a toll on me, but I cannot let him see that, I hope my mask holds up!