Its all me, me, me!

[mrtwopointfour]

In the DR book, I am reading the section on goal setting.

From what i understand the goals are set to how you want to see improvement in your M. For instance, I would like my W to sit in the same room as me at night.

However, many comments from people on here are that we can not control W and therefore goals should be about doing things for ourselves not how we want our W or H to change.

This leaves me a little confused. Which is it?

Should i be setting goals to help me improve myself, which in a way is a 180?

or

Should i be setting goals as to the results i would like to see through my 180's and changes?