Oh, the OW meeting the kids talk. My H knows in no uncertain terms that OW is NOT allowed to be around my children at a MINIMUM until we are D.
I even told my H that I would like it to be several years from D that we introduce significant others to our kids. Just because he overlaped R's doesn't mean my kids are ready for that.
I have no suggestion for whether you have that coversation now. It does need to happen. And you need to keep the emotion at a minimum if you can. I very frankly told my H the above. I also said that here in reality, I will not be ok for a very long time having OW in my kids lives. Period. Now, if we D'd and it was another woman a year or so later, that would be different. That this woman, I will never have a good relationship with. I don't want to even be in the same room, much less have a conversation with her. Honestly, my goal should she stay in his life (which I don't see happening for anyone for a long time!) would be "Meh". I don't have to be friends with her. All I owe her or my kids is no hostility. I wasn't upset or yelling. I was calm and honest. He got it. It's all in the tone. He actually said "That makes sense. I really hadn't thought of it like that."
Yea, I don't think they really think much about reality. Good luck. I know I have no control over his actions, but I will set and enforce firm boundaries when it comes to my kids.
M: 9 yrs T: 13 yrs H:34 Me:35, S4, D2, S 7 months Dday 11/12-PA & multiple PAs Dbing 12/12 S 1/13 7/13 H moved back in basement. 8/13 #3 born 10/13 still cheating 10/13 He moves across country, I file for D
