The two of you actually have a significant history of 13 years together. Even without kids and as you feel that there is nothing else to connect the two of you, she can not just "erase" your memory.
That said, there will also be the divorce process, if it goes there.
Finally, there are likely other people in both your lives who will remain connected to the both of you.
That said, hold your chin up because hope is not lost. There is still an opportunity to save your M, if that is what you would like to do.
You are going to have to man up and get to work on yourself. You need to look at yourself and consider how you can become an even better person than you already are, one that only a fool would leave. If it does not save your M, it will go a long way to helping you in future relationships.
With the history and possible external connections, your W could very well hear about your positive changes. Even more so, if she is involved with someone, she is likely to find out the grass isn't necessarily greener on the other side. Affair Partners (APs) are generally "broken" people, if they are involved with someone who is married. No matter how bad the M is, generally people with good morals and ethics wait to get involved with someone who is already divorced.
So, what are you planning on working on, in yourself?
