Wife is having an emotional affair

[Alan A.]

well, tonight was pretty rough. She got home from rehearsal around 9 and I had some food made so she could eat (I usually do most of the cooking) after she got some food and said very minimal things about her day she went straight to the computer. She spent all night on the computer and texting and didn't even say a word to me. When she got in bed at 1 I said good night and she said good night back but that was all.

I feel like I will not make any progress while she is still talking with OM. I want to work things out with her but I can't stay in a M where I want to take a back seat to OM. I really don't think that even after the A was over that I could be ok with them staying friends, and I know that she would want to. I saw a couple other place where people said that all contact with OM should be cut off. I can't stop thinking that I'm doing everything wrong.