When working with a DB coach, understand that the DB coach is working with you and your specific sitch. Consider that while you may think you are enabling your W and others may suggest the same thing, the reality is, she is remaining close enough to you to notice positive changes you are making in yourself so that she may become more attracted to you and want to save the M.
If you stopped supporting her, kicked her out, and other "tough love" type of things, she won't see positive but only negative.
DBing is about making changes in ourselves which will change the sitch which ultimately could help save our M. Even if those changes seem ridiculous or wrong, at the time.
So in keeping with that vein and your discussion with your DB coach, I would think that your W working for you would be a good idea. Although, just be careful about what work she will do for you and the role you play as her "manager". IOW, if you are in a position to do so, make sure you tailor her job to fit her and does not require you to micro manage her.
