You'll never guess who just called me! OMG. Ok, earlier in the week when I discovered her on POF I emailed some friends and told them what happened. My group is very supportive of each other. Unfortunately, I apparently put SDA Lady's email address in with the others. Her name starts with M as does my friends. So, she got the scoop about how I felt. I discovered this and emailed her an apology and promised to make sure this never happened again. She did not reply. Today she calls me. She wanted to talk to me in person rather than email me because she wanted to express herself appropriately. Fair enough. She told me how hurt she was when I texted her last week and said I wanted to stop our phone conversations. I had told her when she called me distraught, unable to sleep or eat that if she really needed to talk she could call (she asked me and said only if I really really need to). I told her today that she had not been respecting what she'd asked me for, in fact, she was calling just to chat like we had in the past. I found that very difficult because I'm trying to heal and yet talking to her at the same time. I needed space and did what I thought best at the time. She then explained to me why she was on POF. I said she did not need to, she has to deal with her pain in the way she feels is best for her. Yes, I had feelings and thoughts about what she was doing but they were my problem, not hers. She told me that she no one to talk to and thought that maybe if she talked to someone nice she'd feel better. I asked her if she'd gone back to church, she hadn't. I asked her if she'd talked to friends, she replied her only friend was in Taiwan. She told me I would be fine because I had friends and family here while she did not. I told her that I sit alone with no one to talk to frequently and the only reason I have friends to talk to is because I reach out to them. I said that people don't call me all the time to see how I'm doing, I reach out to them...just as she should be doing. She got angry, "don't tell me what to do!" So she plans to wallow alone in her suffering and talk to strange men on POF who just wanna put the wood to her...or call me, the guy who is causing her pain...good plan. She has a ton of friends who call her to wail about their husbands fooling around on them etc yet she can't talk to them? That's her choice. Holy sh!t, she seems to want me to see her through the pain that I am causing her...I told her that and said "no can do". Well, we ended up crying loudly together. It ended with her saying "I guess it's over and we have to both do what is best for ourselves" I agreed. Damn this hurts.
