I didn't really respond to it. However, I can't stop the feeling of wanting to push her away now. It just upsets me so much to have contact with her and to have her continually reassure me that it is over. It is just too much for me emotionally.
I beleive she is no where near as happy as she portrays. However, I do think she is happier not being around me. It is clear that our interactions just make her more and more commited that she is making the right decision, and perhaps she is....as much as I hate to admit it. She seems very upset about losing time with our D and friends, and not even remotely upset about missing me. She also misses having a nice home. Is she happy, I don't think so.
I am going to stay my course. I will continue to work on bettering myself. I truly want to be the best man I can be, for myself and for my Daughter.
Lastnight, I invited over a bunch of friends for a kids movie night. The kids enjoyed "The great mouse detective, while the adults visited and had some drinks in the kitchen. It was an enjoyable night with hardly any talk of W or our impending divorce. I need more of that and less of my pity party and constant break down of emotions with W....I think I just need to distance myself from her completely.
