I don't know if there is any headway here at our home or not. I had started trying to show affection through physical touch. I thought that it was having some effect for the better, but maybe not.
We have ML 3 times in the past 2 weeks. That is an improvement. However, I don't know if she is just using that as a tool to placate me or not.
Last night, we had an argument over the time that the kids were going to bed. She had taken our youngest out for a day with just her. Our youngest goes to bed at 20:00 and they came walking in the door at 21:10. My wife then started to chastise me for not having the oldest in bed yet. Our oldest goes to bed at 20:30.
I had asked my oldest if she wanted to watch a movie with me, figuring that we could spend time together while my wife was out. I told my wife she had no reason to attack me for it. She was in violation of the very same rule that she was penalizing me for violating. If it was ok for them, then I shouldn't be listening to her attacking me over this.
I admit that I was ready to engage in a fight. I have turned the other cheek for so long that I feel she thinks I have no backbone. What triggered my anger was that when she had come back in from her day out, I saw she had removed her ring again. It appears that what she does is wear it around me and remove it when I am not with her. Within 10 minutes of coming home she had put it back on.
Obviously, her conduct erodes any trace of trust that I have in her. This past week, I have been VERY tempted to place keylogging software on her computer. She spends an inordinate amount of time on it and is always very nebulous about what she does there. She still doesn't share information about her her day's activities with me.
I have resisted every temptation that I have had. I HAVE been successful at this.
25's advice to GAL is the tool I need to use for this. 25 was also talking about how we all need to get to the point where we are ready to walk away ourselves.
I don't need any of this Sh!t. I'm ready to start living my life without her. I don't deserve this treatment and I certainly think I will be much better off without her if this is all I have to look forward to if we remain together.
