One of the most valuable things I learned early on is A) I am a control freak and B) the fact that the only person I can control is me. This helped me immensely with my relationship with my kids, as I had tried to control everything and it really wasn't working.
So I recognize your H's petty behaviour for what it is and I kinda feel sorry for him, because he is not developing the relationship he could have with what seems like some very awesome kids
