I used to worry a lot about appearances and what would other people think of me. When I go in AlAnon I learned a phrase that helps remind me:

It's none of my business what others think of me.

Me 57/H 58
M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13

Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do.
I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering.
Caroline Myss