Thanks guys, i will answer your posts a little later. Right now I am still shaking from what happened at the local supermarket this morning.
First off, those of you who've been with me for a while will be pleased to know that I managed NOT to buy a ticket for the Jerry Springer Show this time.
Without everyone's care and advice last time I was in a similar place, i wouldn't have handled things so well.
S14 and I were doing our Sat morning shop at the local supermarket. I'd sent him back to get a plastic bag for some meat, when I looked up and saw STBX and OW heading my way - coming from the direction that S14 had just gone.
This is the first time S14 has seen them together.
I stuck my head into the Ugg boot shelf that I was looking at and they both walked past me and down the aisle I was about to enter.
S14 walked back to me looking physically ill. He was teary and white and shaking and said he'd just seen them - and that his father had walked straight past him in the aisle. Looked at him. but said nothing to him.
I hugged S14 and tried to settle him a bit before moving on into a different aisle than the one I wanted to go down (as STBX and OW were in it). No sooner had I entered the aisle than they came into the same aisle from the other direction. They were walking straight towards us. I quickly took s14 under my wing and turned around and headed for the checkout. By the time we got there, stbx and OW were there too. I waited and waited but they were still there when I went to go out so i just turned my back to their direction and went on unloading my goods.
Just as I was paying, stbx came up behind us and tried to talk to S14. He didn't acknowledge me. S14 told stbx to F off (he was in tears by this stage). Stbx persisted and s14 told him to F off again. I then told stbx to "Leave us alone, please". The checkout operator was looking nervous by now.
Stbx kept going, trying to get S14 to talk to him right there. I told him again to "Leave us alone". Checkout operator was about to panic, i think. it looked like we were being harassed.
I paid and walked away. As we exited the car park, I looked in my rear view and there they were - stbx driving her Merc convertible right behind us and heading down the street towards our house (and in the opposite direction to where he and OW live). I turned off to try to get rid of them.
When we got home a few mins later, stbx rang S14's phone 'to talk about this" and tried to point out how wrong it was of S14 to react the way he did.
Lots of admonishment from stbx and lecturing S14 about 'reality' and how he had to get used to it. S14 just stood his ground and said that stbx was not behaving appropriately and he should look to his own behaviour.
Along the way, stbx said that he was no longer living at OW's.
I was quietly pleased for a sec or two, as I thought this might signal something important. But then I realised that it's probably because the court case is coming up. OW is named in the proceedings and so is her address. He does not pay rent and the house is on the most prestigious street in our city. It all looks bad for him and would affect the amount of support he'd have to pay.
He told S14 that he's back living with the male friend that he claimed he was living with when he first left our home. Here (in a very lower class suburb) he has to pay rent (or at least it looks more likely on paper). Said that he works from there too.
When S14 said that he didn't believe a word of this, stbx explained that it was because his beloved felt that i would attack her if he lived with her any more.
Anyway, I would appreciate some feedback from all you kind souls out there who helped me through this last time.
At the moment I'm thinking that if this is the start of a standard practice on their part - going shopping together at my local supermarket, I'm not going to dodge and weave anymore. Maybe I'll follow them up and down the aisles and make sure I'm right behind them in the queue. Guilt/shame/embarrassment anyone? Only fantasising.. but you can see where i'd be without input from saner heads.
