Here is the last text she sent asking about talk time. There have been a few of these over the last couple of months:
"When u have the time, can we email or text about our relationship and future? It's hard to talk, but we need to. Limbo is not the place to try and live. It does not work. But I'll wait for ur timing. For now anyhow, I'm not over anxious."
I think you perhaps misunderstand DB'ing on this, the DB 180 rule is not to INITIATE any R talks. If your W wants to talk about it then by all means, talk to her. Because if you dodge it, then it's likely just "more of the same" behavior from you. The key to talking to her is to LISTEN and VALIDATE. She says she thinks it's over and divorce is inevitable? You nod and tell her you understand why she feels that way. Ask her how that makes her feel, try to get her to discuss her feelings and then you validate them. Don't agree/ disagree/ reason/ explain/ justify/ argue/ etc. Just seek to understand her feelings and emotions. And DO NOT PANIC!!! Pretty much all WAS's will talk in absolutes, saying things like "we will never be able to reconcile", "my mind is made up", "there is no chance for us", "divorce is the only way", etc. Just expect it and don't be surprised when you hear it. Keep your cool. The more you fight her on these things the more she'll want to push for D. However, if you take all the pressure off and empathize with her feelings, she won't feel the need to run out and file.
Often the WAS will push to talk about D, then after they do have that talk things go into limbo and they just quit pushing for it.
