My W definitely did...my presence in the house irritated her, when I was away at work I irritated her...lol.
It's part of the journey...if you are being the best person you can be, working on yourself and finding the bits of truth in her complaints about you now, and in the past, and fixing those you deem need fixing...then just don't take it personally, it's her issue that she can't properly address as an adult right now.
If you can do the above, and wait it out, eventually she will figure out that it really isn't ALL you, but mostly within her. But that may take a while, and hopefully you won't get the full-on venom spewing alien monster that I experienced...
My W, who seems to be coming out of the tunnel, has told me that it really wasn't "me", but what I represented and reflected back to her about herself, some projection of her cognitive dissonance...but also some of my habits/ways of doing things that she never spoke up about all these years...There was also A LOT of repressed anger at tons of things not involving me from childhood and teenage years that, well, I was the closest, safest target to direct that anger towards...she eventually burned it out because I didn't interfere or defend myself (you can't reason with them right now).
So, be the best you can be, work on creating a better YOU! And sit tight for a very interesting ride...your goal is to outlast her mlc, so keep the big picture in mind and read a lot of other people's sitches here...so much you learn and it really helps us find perspective.
T^2
In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. - Albert Camus
Uncertainty is the very condition which impels people to unfold their powers.-Eric Fromm
