He plans to start seperation even if its in the same house.. i dont want to hear from him that the EA happened only after seperation as i understand this is what he will do if i confront him post seperation.
I want to post again to stress that anything to do with you trying to get him to admit the A, could amount to nothing.
My ex had three EA's that I know of. Each one of them with fairly significant proof. My ex and I are almost two years separated and she has still not formally presented the most significant OM as anything other than a "friend", to anyone, as far as I know. Your H may not become public with the OP, even in separation.
