Feeling the need to excise some thoughts from my head.
It has been six days since our R talk and there has been no contact whatsoever from xSO. It is about this time when I want to contact him but I am sitting on my hands for now.
In the end I feel as if I have backslid badly and I think the best way to remedy that is to give him some space for now and believe he will contact me when he is ready.
For me, my goal is the same: I would like the chance to work at our relationship but if not then I want to be absolutely ready to let go. My panic stricken R talk probably felt like a million pounds of pressure sure to make him run. But I have taken away some valuable lessons: there were lots of things I could have said but didn't, when an argument began (I was not cheating on you) I managed to swallow it before it got out of control and that he still stuck despite the counselling.
One of my goals for me has been to become a more attentive and compassionate listener. Obviously I still need some work but I hope to keep working on it because that is a skill that will carry through my other relationships as well.
So a step back. But with any luck a little truth dart has been planted. Only time will tell.
