Time to roll up the sleeves

[mrtwopointfour]

Just Venting:
Its funny how something as small as the above can make you feel very down again. That and the fact W has booked a trip away soon, I don't know whether its with OM, but she is doing little things that make me think she is preparing herself to look her best, and this is eating me up a bit.

I think I am doing this DR thing wrong, because right now i feel lost as to whether what i am doing is helping me or the sitch. My W seems to be pulling away more and more (not in a cold way, just in a very slow and subtle way), and I wonder if I need to basically let go and see what happens. Up to now I have been balancing, being there, doing stuff for W, but keeping a distance and giving space. But sometimes my offering to do stuff, or just being around I think annoys W - then again we live in the same house so its going be tricky.

I also wish W would stop acting as if she hates me. She is friendly and talkative, but its almost like she it treating me like somebody that she dislikes but is getting on with for the sake of it. She can be nasty at times, rude, call me names, put me down all the time. Then if she needs my help she asks for it and I feel like I am needed again. I don't know how I can still be in love with her!!