After phone coaching session #2

[azguy]

Ugh. Sounds like a rough evening. From you description you put on a brave front. I hope your thoughts are venting, not how you'd like to proceed.

You mentioned H receiving texts. Of course, he couldn't avoid that. At least he had the sense to put away his phone once he started to receive them. If he didn't spend significant time responding to them, perhaps you can focus on those two things as going better than they could have.

Part of your hurt sounds like it comes from being surprised because from "reading his online posts, they had ended things" I don't know the context of this. It seems like you were snooping on his activities? This never leads anywhere good.

He already told you that the mail was not D papers. Sounds to me like these couple of events have really activated some fears of yours.

I'd be scared too. You're working on things, and there's no sign of a response, and threats from the OW. Remember to detach, as much as possible. Your intention to work on things is something you've decided to do, independent of whether he responds to it or not (right?) Of course, you might one day end up rethinking your intentions, but for now hang in there. He'll notice, if he's not really an asshat.