The conventional wisdom is that affairs usually last around two years. BUT I believe MLC affairs have their own qualities , and my xh's affair lasted 6 years, on and off. Long after he even pretended that he loved her. i think if they have wrecked their marriage, and alienated their kids, they hang on harder to the affair. So it is a fine line between letting them cake eat and pushing them out.
I had a mean and angry spewer, but looking back i wonder if I could have handled it more graciously. I suspect the more alienated they are the harder it is for them to reach out.
