i am quietly going about my way - forward mostly i thnk. i am not jumping up and down and demanding change or "the end". i am however, trying to be always aware that perhaps it's just over and i will need to live alone and get used to it.
it's not so scary- i do not embrace it. i am remaining open hee and awaiting what life presents to me. since i have no giant one thing i can just go out and "get" - i'm just waiting to see what comes to me.
sounds dumb i guess - but it's me and where i'm at. i'm trying to be quiet and patient and assume life will come along on it's own - like it or not- and things will happen that will initiate other things to happen and so on.
i sure have faith in the universe don't I - or whatever you'd call that-
i think, unfortuntely, when there are things beyond our ability to fix- we must just wait. jumping up and down and demanding things i can't just acquire- won't get me anywehre other than more tired (nearly impossible i'd think) - i'm awaiting something- a sign, a person, a something-
i thnk you are too- i understand where you are.
we may not be burning wi6th love for these lost men- but we don't have their replacements either- love, body, life - i think it all comes slowly- our r with them didn't happen in a day either (hence the problem letting it go) - but very probably- as sure as the tides change- change will force itself upon us- we'll react- or act- or do whatever is needed when it does- and we'll be heading down some new road we probably never could imagine- lets hope it's a good one- lets hope we see the "opening" when it appears- lets NOT WORRY ABOUT ALL THIS- we're okay rite now- and today is all we have (compliments of harvard brain guy)
xxoo do not worry- read this: i like it- it's pinned rite here in my face:
Desiderate:
G0 PLACIDLY amid the noise and haste and remember what peact there may be in silence. As far as possible without surrender be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even the dull & ignorant; they too have their story.
AVOID loud and aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit. If you compare yourself with othrs, you may become vain & bitter; for always there will be greater & lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
KEEP interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time. Exercise caution in your business affairs; for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals; and everywhere life is full of heroism.
BE YOURSELF, Especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is perennial as the grass.
TAKE KINDLY the counsel of the years, gracefuly surrendering the things of yough. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness. Beyond a wholesome diciplin, be gentle with yourself.
YOU ARE A CHILD OF THE UNIVERSE, no less than the trees and the stars. you have a right to be here . And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.
THEREFORE, BE AT PEACE WITH gOD, WHATEVER YOU CONCEIVE HIM TO BE AND WHATEVER YOUR labors & aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace with your soul.
WITH ALL it's sham, drudgery & broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be careful - Strive to be happy.
