2.5 - Don't believe her when she says she's miserable. My W is always telling me things (I was cause of her illness (it's genetic so figure that one out), she never loved me, I ruined every moment of her life, we're just friends, blah, blah, blah. Sad but anymore I believe more of what comes out of my S5's mouth than I do hers and he's got a huge imagination.
People can only give outwardly, what they feel internally....
What they chose to show us, is all of the hurt that they have inside of them, because yes, we still stir that emotion in them.
They will lash out, and say whatever they know will hurt the most.
It doesn't mean that it is true, although it is very true to them...
It doesn't make them crazy, or wrong, or anything.
It means that they are hurting too...
Lashing out at the person that knows them the best, and is the most danger to seeing right through them.
So, while they may not be true, there is value in their words...
What you are saying here makes complete sense, and I will remember this in the future. With my W, she has been through a catalogue of painful experiences death in family, death of parent, anti natal depression, losing job, and then the issues I brought to the M - which I guess as you say being the person closest and tied to them makes me the vent and focus for all this hurt and pain, and W can only see that my issues have caused all this misery and unhappiness. So I have to be the one to get rid of to make it all better.
Me: 38 W: 35 M: 9Yrs T: 15Yrs S8 D5 BD: Feb 13 Still Living Together
I feel like I'm in thick forest, I'm slowly drawing a map of the way out, but not sure yet which side of the forest I will emerge.
