I only recently figured out that I'm not as good of a listener as I thought I was... working on that.
And the open-ended questions to draw someone out - that literally makes my mind go blank. I started a list of things to say and wrote: how do you feel about that? But can't figure out how to pull that one off without feeling like I'm a cliche shrink...
I've been trying to practice validation with my kids more and the amount of conscious effort it takes seems unnatural.
I can offer my opinion on your #2 question, it's best not to simply offer an opposing opinion of her appearance if she's feeling down. W: I'm having a bad hair day H: No your hair looks great! - not good enough. I guess that would be a time to ask "why do you think that?" but then always reassure her afterwards. But women don't like being contradicted about their insecurities.
