Wife said she was done!

[Maritimer]

I know exactly what you mean. My W had a whole damned switchboard she was flipping quite regularly. It's no fun and always kept me off balance, until I started detaching and looking at life differently.

My sitch has been going on MUCH longer than yours and I came into DB'ing way too late to save my M - that's the sad truth. DB'ing is about going against your gut feelings and what makes sense to you. So the question is this - does SHE want to talk these things thru right now?

When I spoke with her on the weekend I got a feeling she was getting more comfortable talking with me. Its been 4 months now and it has been really hard emotionally although I dont let her see that. I guess I should hold back because I dont want to freak out the squirrel and have her run back up that tree.

Odds are that she does not, and is trying to sort out her own thoughts and feelings and doesn't have a real grasp on those for herself. Now you want to throw into the mix your thoughts and feelings - this is pressure, pure and simple.

Thanks, I needed to be reeled back in... I wonder how long I can wait this out.