Busting and GWN,
Thanks for letting me know about your sitches in this regard.

It has taken me a few days to 'recover' from seeing the inlaws in their own home (I'm usually OK seeing them in my house; it just shook me a bit to go up to visit them).

So, today was Court Day.

Oh my.... grand result: stood around for 2 and a half hours with lawyers in tow, and spent less than 5 mins in court to get a date for a conciliation hearing (necessary next step in the D process) in 3 months time. Probably blew around 2 thousand dollars each.

H was livid with me.

I spent most of the time talking to him in the foyer. He turned up in a pair of denim jeans and a jumper (to court!) - this is a man who usually wears the most expensive Italian suits and ties (courtesy of me, I might add). He was presenting as a 'poor' spouse who earns so much less than his W.

Things he said:

1. He was not going to be represented by a L. She then turned up and he said "I must have already paid her for this and so that's why she's here".

2. Asked me repeatedly (like, over and over again) if I knew how much this was going to cost.

3. Told me his business failure was my fault as I would not let him sell all of our property (rental apartments) and spend the Trust money quickly enough to support his tax debt. Said my procrastination had been the cause of all his business problems in the past and that nothing had changed.

4. Accused me of obstructing the Divorce when I took the magistrate's advice to adjourn the application hearing a couple of weeks ago on the grounds that no arrangements were in place for child support. He said he had offered then and there to 'reinstate' the payments and that I had still made the decision to adjourn.
(after all, his word is his bond!!!)

4. At one point, when I disagreed with him, told me "It's just the drugs talking". When I asked him what drugs, he said that it was the fact that he had to take medication for brain aneurisms. That what he was saying was obviously a result of the damage he'd sustained to his brain.
(This was something I'd raised with him prior to BD when he was starting to act so recklessly with our money).

5. Said that I would wreck everything by keeping on resisting his generous offer of settlement. Told me that I would now lose the house.

6. Told me that I was 'playing' him.

7. Said that his L told him that my L was the 'most expensive in town', and that if I could afford him, he (stbx) should withdraw his 'generous' offer and go me for 50% of everything.

8. Said he was not going to pay child support so I could pay for an expensive lawyer out of it.

9. Accused me of emotional blackmail when I asked him to please start CS payments again. Said I always used emotional blackmail on him and nothing had changed.

10. Said that he had instructed my L to deal directly with him in future, that he would not be employing a L any more.

11. Was on the verge of tears repeatedly: eyes bloodshot and weepy.