Alright. Here's the answers I've come up with from Mach 1's homework:
What does love mean to me?
Love means to me having the warm feeling inside knowing that someone is missing me when I'm gone and will be there when I return. Love is whether I'm a winner or a loser, I still get hugs and kind words. Love is being able to look into each other's eyes and not having to say a word to feel that we care for one another.
What does a good M look like?
The couple appears to adore and respect each other; they do activities that continue to bond them; speak each other's LL; care for each other enough to encourage separate activities every once in a while; share and experience what makes each other different, don't avoid it; support one another's desires, goals and dreams.
Career vs. M or R and why?
Because I have a fear of not being able to provide for my family after retirement.
Where does W rank in priority?
I know now that W played 2nd fiddle to job. This is wrong in so many ways that I cannot believe I didn't see it. A wise man told me (when it was probably too late) that "when you leave the military, who will be left? YOUR FAMILY! The military will find someone else to fill your spot."
How can I avoid letting W down again?
Figure out her LL and go with that and really apply myself. I really need to express to her that she is cherished and I'm grateful that she considered holding on. Doing the "small things" daily and being creative with them. Never stop the sweet nothings and more hugs (non-sexual) more often. I don't ever want her to feel the hurt she endured over the years. I want to love her and love her well.
Goals for my change: -180 from being judgemental/superior -180 from being a "problem solver" -Listen... really listen to her(even if I have to stop what I'm doing) -Validate feelings more often -Provide for quality time -Involve W in career aspirations (she has a vote) -More fun OUT of the house
A lot of these responses were difficult to come up with. I really used the time to think on these. But this is the start I need before I can move forward. Thanks M1!
