Urworthy there are so many truths in your post and truly detaching is definitely the goal. I am totally over him in at least one way and thats me wanting to be with him. I do not want to be in a relationship with any man that could be so cruel.
I just have a really big issue when it comes to the kids being in the arms and being loved by another woman. It is not rationale or sane but it can definitely send me over the top. (I want to write I will work on this, but I cant even write that now - how can I work on being kind to a home wrecker, how can I work on accepting that what is best for my kids is that they bounce back in forth between two homes. I accept that they will be okay, that they will be fine but I believe that my H and OW are doing my kids a grave injustice)
KG, I really appreciated your post. I am definitely not a Pema Choldron or Mother Theresa, I am human and have strong feelings especially when it comes to my kids.
I give myself a B for my interaction the other day with my H. Actually for my interaction with my H I give myself an A but I got a D for my behavior with the kids.
I did not yell or scream when I told my H his behavior was wrong. I just told him my truth. This was actually a big accomplishment for me. I have been silent as my H has abused me since Sept 2011.
He has blamed me time and time again that he had no choice but to leave his abusive W. I have accepted that statement and accepted the blame. Sunday night was the first time I stood up to him and said in a reasonable way (not as I did post bomb when I flew off the handle) but it a reasonable way. This is not right.
The reason I didnt want to have a conversation about it is because its not a debate. He clearly thinks its right for kids and I clearly don't. There isnt much too talk about, I just wanted to go on record in reasonable way and say I do not condone this. I will not stop you and I will not mention it again but I do not approve of this for my kids.
I will not be silent.
I am worthy. I can love myself.
I definitely have a way to go to reach serenity but each day I inch myself just a little closer.
Love you guys
---- M 39 H 35 D5,D4 M 4 T 9 ILYBNILWY 5/18/11 Left 7/11/11 Divorced 12/1/13
