I think I get what you mean when you say you are experiencing an urge to walk away. I think this is what detachment is ultimately about, that we have to say good-bye.
Because even if there was a reunion, it wouldn't be a continuation of the old R. It couldn't be because too much has been said and done, both individuals will have changed so the R would also have to change. And that change can't happen as long as we hold on to what we knew and who the spouse or ourselves were.
Your sitch makes any sort of reunion or continuation more of a challenge because of the distance.
Its been a heck of an 8 months hasn't it Portia? So much has happened. But you're still going because you're strong and maybe too a little wiser now? (Not that you weren't wise before, but basing this on how I feel about my own sitch, well I can see where I went wrong, how I could have done some things differently. So at least I might not make the same mistakes again.)
Its been nice getting to know you here on DB. I feel we would be friends in the "real" world. I can see where you will come here less and less on your journey - the nature of this board for most I guess. I want to be sure to tell you good luck, and that I wish the very best to you.
Me 46 H 56 M 22 yrs S22, D20, Twin Ss18
You teach people how to treat you by what you allow. What you stop. And what you reinforce. ~~~~~~~ A lack of boundaries invites a lack of respect.
because you're strong 