Okay, thanks. No, you can't read her mind, but since I had an EA, I try to help the LBH's know more about her mental attitude. Men and women think so differently from each other, I try to help explain what little I can.
Quote:
I didn't think I was fighting her, but I suppose that any amount of pressure at all can be considered resistance.
That was me responding to the question you had asked us about what to do toward her wanting a D. You wanted to know if you fight it or just give it over to her. But on the other hand, you need to realize that she sees you as fighting her. I think most WAW's sees any resistance from the LBH about a D..."as fighting her".
The way you handle yourself during this process could determine the future with her. Sometimes, a couple has to get away from each other in order to get better and then have a shot together later. But please understand that I'm not saying to go file, I'm just trying to help you see that D is not the end of life....or the end of a possible future together. I do believe the the more you resemble the back side of a donkey, the more she'll justify her reasons for getting out of the M.
Your children are blessed to have a father who loves them so much. They will look at you to see how an adult handles personal heartache. It's not a role you wish for any of them, but some day they each will need to have in mind that model of their father, and the example he was to them. In spite of the pain, I hope you can always speak to your W and speak about her to your children that is an example of respect. That is not always easy, but it's important....and it's for their sake you do it.
Keep learning. Stay encouraged to better yourself more each day. Believe you can....and WILL do it.
With that in mind, perhaps you could think of some personal goals. Don't make them with your W in mind, just you and how you can have better relationships.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
